Since my child was born practically, I have been a single parent. I was there for every single midnight feeding - alone. I have been there for every bump, scrape, and triumph along the way for twelve years now. Those that know me and my son know that we have an EXCEPTIONALLY close relationship. When I am sick, he will NOT leave me. When I am sad, he cheers me up. It's not uncommon for him to walk into a room just to tell me he loves me, we chit chat late into the night, and he's been known to give up time with friends to hang out with Mom. Today I read this article on Yahoo! It really really made me angry.
While I understand that in the past the "normal" family structure was mom, dad, and children. However that family dynamic is becoming more and more abnormal everyday. As the times and economic climate changes we are finding more and more changes in the American family. My son attends school with kids being raised by grandparents, aunts, foster parents, and same sex couples. The beauty is that this generation is coming to understand the true meaning of family: the people you share your life with, that love and cherish you. It does not matter one bit if they are your biological mother and father, as long as you are loved and cared for!
No one that knows my son would say he suffers one bit. But then again we are abnormal all the way around. We live in an extended family situation. That's right we don't only share our lives with one ADHD Border Terrier and a cranky cat but we also live with my parents, my brother, his wife, and two children and their very playful loving cat! Yep, you got it, we're one really close knit loving family and we wouldn't trade one minute of all the craziness for a million dollars.
I am so offended by this writer that I can hardly contain my sentiments and therefore I have shared them with you! I am a proud single mother who wouldn't trade my life with the queen of England!
Ok, you might get a little upset with me, but I'd like you to think about this article again before you stay so angered. The negatives it talks about being of concern don't really apply to you because although you are an unmarried mother you aren't a single care giver. Like you said you have your parents, your brother and your sister-in-law all easily accessible. If you need to go to the doctor you have people to help you, or for the other argument Jon has great male role models that live right in your house. I'm not trying to belittle what you have done, you are a wonderful mother, but what I got from the article is that you have that huge committment and open communication with your son just like it says, but the down sides like being the sole financial supporter, or lacking a male role model, or being left out on things like father's day don't seem like a big deal to you because you have just replaced a father with several family members.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't always that way and there were times when I had to be the sole provider but even then I put him first. But I do see what you say. I have sacrificed a great deal of my own independence to provide him with the family he has. I do see what you are saying.
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